A Debated Post

I debated greatly about posting this, for a variety of reasons. First, I don't want to suggest that I don't enjoy my program or think its worthwhile, because I really do, and it really is. I also don't want to mis-represent FCI, which in general is an incredible school with first rate instructors. But I also realized that this blog is supposed to represent my experience-the good as well as the bad. It
Today was not one of the best I've had. In fact, I would say the worst. Not because I was stressed, or products weren't working. The atmosphere in the class today was thick with anxiety, all due to our chef. Since Chef Jergens promotion we've had our old chef from level one instructing (Chef Tom) with our level 2 assisting (Chef. Chris). No one was looking forward to this. Not only were we sad to see Chef Jergen go, since he truly is a phenomenal teacher, but also because we aren't particularly fond of Chef Tom. We were hoping for the best however, but none of us could have seen what happened today coming. The day began fine enough, there was a little tension between the chefs (rumor has it they aren't exactly best friends), and it was a little slow, but not awful. After lunch three recipes were to be demoed before we made them (mousses). Everything was going wrong for them, mis communication resulting in one mistake after another. The three demos were supposed to take 20 minutes, after thirty, the first one had just been completed. Chef Tom clearly frustrated with how things were going, and the class quickly loosing ability to pay attention he just stopped. He was so frustrated with the demo not working, and Chef. Chris' attempts to help. He just declared we were wasting time and ought to just go ahead and try it ourselves. They then went into the hallway where Chef. Tom proceeded to yell at Chef. Chris (we could only see, not hear), presumably about what had just happened. Between that and the dirty looks he had shot him during the demo-we were all on edge. We've seen Chef. Tom irritated, and that was bad enough. I can't begin to describe the feeling of the class, we were all anxious, and some were ready to walk out (this wasn't what we signed up for). When they returned Chef. Chris seemed near tears, and all of us had began running around the kitchen working attempting as best we could to stay under the radar. We barely finished in time, with him breathing down our necks telling us to hurry it up (remember, we've never done this before). Finally, we finished, and cleaned up. I felt sick the whole time, feeding off the anxiety of others, and personal fear of being singled out. I was exhausted and near breaking down. I think we are were.
I left class today feeling terrible, aside from exhausted, physically and emotionally. I could have cried at any moment. II'm fine now, but it took a few hours, and a lot of re-assuring myself. I really do try to make the best of these situations that occasionally arise, having my own interest in mind its most beneficial for me to get over it and get out what I can. During class I tried to focus on the product I was making, being meticulous, and it paid off! My mousse was perfect, and I was really proud of it. I think back to my college years, with less than stellar professors. I remember advice I got (much from my Dad), about not letting it take your energy, focusing on personal growth. I've dealt with these types before, and it most certainly won't be the last. And every time I do, I feel better and better about adapting and not letting it hurt me. I recognize that if I focus on what I'm trying to achieve (learning techniques) I will learn them. Granted with a good instructor, it's easy. You want to learn, and they are there to support you. But in this case we are force to look for intrinsic motivation, to achieve what you want, regardless. I know I must love what I'm doing, because even though it was absolutely awful, it isn't fazing me too badly, and I feel just as determined to learn. I'm hoping of course, that this won't become a trend. Because despite how hard I try, it is incredibly draining.
We were also given a homework assignment related to our own menu projects. Write a dessert menu for our school's restaurant (L'Ecole). We spent 30 minutes discussing riveting things such as "what does a menu tell you?" It all feels elementary, and I wish we could just do our own, without all this obnoxious hand-holding. At first, I was annoyed at the homework-I don't want to make a menu for a French restaurant, then spend time tomorrow in groups discussing and coming up with combined menus (mostly because in general, my class is super traditional-which to me equates to boring.I doubt my opinion will be considered). But then I realized often in my career I'll have to compromise, and this is just an example. Here's what I came up with!


Chocolate, Caramel, Walnut Tart
black-pepper lemon curd, fleur de sel, earl grey ice-cream

Thyme and Bourbon Vanilla Creme Brulee
meyer lemon Confit, Micro Basil.

Green Tea Genoise
matcha strawberry salad, matcha creme chantilly

Chocolate Mousse
85% valrhona chocolate, black-sesame ginger ice-cream, kumquat puree

Hazelnut Souffle
roasted pear, chamomile sorbet

Chartruese and Fig Granite
Marsala sabayon, cinnamon sable

Liquid Chocolate Beignets
Hybiscus syrup, cardamon ice-cream


Fried Frangipane
Strawberry compote, aged balsamic reduction, basil gelee
(adapted from Providence’s “sweeter side of panzanella”)

Last, a complete side note, here's the link to the article Oprah did on Liddabit!!
http://www.oprah.com/food/Halloween-Recipes-How-to-Make-Candy/1
At least, I absolutely love my job.